Hello, my name is Kenneth McFadden I’m a disabled veteran dealing traumas from the service. After exiting the A.F. I fought with myself quite a bit (PTSD). My mother passed away out of the blue on me, I had just talked to both parents the night before. My father asked me to come home and be his caregiver, as that was what I was doing in Washington State at the time. I relocated to GA., we shared many great times together, I learned so much from him. He lived a great life and did so much for so many, while being polite/humbled/and great person. He was now sickle with prostate cancer and other illnesses seeing my father wither away as the cancer broke him down. Caused me to be a basket case, needless to say. I became dad’s caregiver, and we grew very close till his passing. While he was on hospice, I took him too many places and appointments, everywhere we went he left people with smiles and positive vibes. He was a great man / father / husband / grandfather / provider, and he was a great hero to me. I knew it was coming, but even then, I wasn’t ready as many are not. I was in the next room to him and missed him leaving. I did the thing to myself, If I had only, I was a wreck. Not knowing how to release this burst of energy, I was lost for words. My father and I had done yardwork and gardening together for a few years. He liked his yard looking right and tight, I went and tightened up his yard crying the whole time. One of many things Dad always said was, “why my, then why not me”. He showed me by watching him deal with his is issues, keep your peace and share it at the same time. Very hard to master.